Yeah...Nothing Special [Went to church today.]

Wow.

I am so content being me. Before, I had some issues wanting other people's lives. I have realized though, that it's perfectly OTAY to be myself because everybody has problems. So if it's not one thing it's another. I have also realized that even though they really get on my nerves, I have really great friends & associates. Some of them can have they little attitudes sometimes, but I love them ALL none-the-less. But I'm a person of my own and can't stand on them, that's the thing. I have a wonderful life, wonderful people, and everything's going GREAT.

In only two short days, I'll have my schedule for sophomore year. I can't believe I'm not a freshman anymore. Before I know it; I'll be gone ! But that's wayyy ahead in the future. ANYHOW, today's sermon was excellent and talked about how we shouldn't let other people deter us from what we are supposed to do or what our dreams are. I really do believe that because the world is FULL of haters who want nothing more than to see you fail.

TO PUT IT IN A NUTSHELL; MY LIFE IS FANTASTIC ! I KNOW SUCH WOOOONDERFUL PEOPLE, GOOOT MONEY, AND LIVE THE LIFE OF A TRUE MOGUL !
OH YEAH !

Membership Sunday !

Today was Membership Sunday at Salem Baptist Church of Chicago !!! I went wit my lil all white on lookin REEEAL good along with my two friends Kam'ryne and Arriel. It was a really great service and Ienjoyed it. Our church under the wonderful leadership of our PASTOR is doing great things and I can't wait to be apart of them. The school system is shot to hell and something needs to be DONE about it ! But, in OTHER news, today concluded MyChicago which now means I can devote the rest of my summer to working, and getting ready for school. I register for sophomore year on AUGUST 19 2008 !!! OH YEAH 2011 IN THE BUILDING ! But for now, life is going pretty decent........I think there's something EXCELLENT in store for me. It just hasn't been yet revealed.
=]

What's Really Good in the Hood ?

As I stated in the first post, I see and hear a lot on the train.
This is something that happened to me on the way HOME....[not really HAPPENED, but something I noticed.]
There was this young dude on the train who musta been like, 18 or 19, and he was just sitting there. He honestly had the appearance of a hard ass gangster. Like real talk. So I'm thinking, oh shit, what he finna be on, you know, you USUALLY think when you see someone you think is up to no good. So, buddy's phone rings. It's his mama. He like hey mama, yeah mama I'm on my way home....and he was quiet , idk his mama must have been asking him something....then he was like, man I been on the train all day. I just went out and didn't come back [yeah he's still on the phone]. He was like, it's too much going on at home and I can't stay there. On the block it's too much to deal with. He was like, Man my friend got killed Monday and just yesterday this nigga got shot in the alley. Then he was talking about how that wasn't the life he wanted and how he just didn't want to be killed before he could figure out how to turn it around. He was like it's too much. I just had to go. He rode ALLLL the way to Howard and BACK.........Man.

Just take that in. What the hell are we doing black people ? SERIOUSLY. This AIN'T cool.

* ONE MORE [positive] note* One bus I got on today, it was this real young dude musta been about 21 or 22 driving the bus. He was a trainee because there was this CTA man with a white shit standing over his shoulder telling him, ok you finna stop here and all that kinda stuff. Even though dude had on TWO ear rings && his hat was cocked, I respected him because he was driving a damn bus. A bus that his friends could get on and see him, or ANYTHING. He don't feel like he need to be on the streets to get his money. He was polite and whatnot, he ain't have no attitude or nothing. He greeted the people [GENUINELY] as the got on and exited the bus.
I'm glad to see if nothing but ONE POSITIVE BLACK MAN [whom I don't know I guess] doing something that seperates himself from what everyone else wants us to be.........

I believe that children are our future.......

Even though I this is my first blog post, I'm not about to start with the usual--this is my first blog post blah, blah, blah. I'm going to talk about my break through that I had today.

I'm able to get a lot of thinking done in the mornings on the train, on my way downtown. Some people read, some people talk loud and ignorant as hell on the phone, some people text, most people listen to music, but I just sit, and look, and listen. I find a lot of things SO interesting, and there isn't a day that goes by that I see something that speaks to me.

This morning, on the train, I saw this lady and her daughter. So the lady was a nice, young black lady. She wasn't loud, cussing at the little girl or anything like that and I really don't know where they were going. So anyway I'm NOTICING them because I'm sitting down and they were standing like right next to that lil plexi-glass when you finna get off. The little girl was so adorable. She musta been about 5 or 6 years old. So she started singing "We Will Rock You" I started smiling to myself because I was amazed that this little girl knew the words to this song. Anyway she's talking to her mother asking her about the train and stuff, and the mother is politely responding back and I'm listening. This little girl aint dumb, she don't appear to be a genius or anything like that but she just has SO MUCH SPIRIT ! She like mama where do we get off ? What' sthat ? Does that do this ? That's when it hit me; THAT LITTLE GIRL CAN GROW UP TO BE ANYTHING SHE WANTS. ANYTHING. A-N-Y-T-H-I-N-G. But she doesn't even have a chance with our school systems shot to hell. Today, I realized that while little kids get on my nerve....that they are really worth it. Somebody needs to start making a positive impact on the lives of children today [becuz hell, CPS who SUPPOSED to be doing it, damn sho AINT]......I think today for the first time, I felt like a child was somebody who is going to run this world someday, and needs to be taught how to do so........&& what a better to help DO so, then me ?

Who Am I && Why Am I Here ?

So Monday.....I was downtown in the class at Loyola. The day was going fairly decent I would say. All the way up until lunchtime, when my day came spiraling down. I was being annoyed at the class because I wanted to go home. There was ANOTHER person who was aggravating me OUTSIDE of the class [as in someone I was texting]. Yeah so anyway,....most of you know that I've been looking for a job. A REAL JOB. Most of you ALSO know that I currently...well I used to have a job ummm...working at my church [yeah...we'll say that.] So I decided to call one of the places that I applied to, during my lunchtime. I called AMC THEATERS FORD CITY. So when I called the lady is like THANKYOUFORCALLINGFORDCITYAMCTHEATERSHOWMAYIHELPYOU. So I'm like Hello, May I speak to the manager please ? ONEMOMENT. The manager Delores, gets on the phone and is like THISISDELORESMANAGEROFAMCFORDCITYWHATCANIHELPYOUWITH ? So I explained to her that I filled out the application && that I was calling to find out the status of it. She gave me THE most generic answer "THE MANAGER[refering to herself in third person] IS CURRENTLY REVIEWING ALL SUBMITED APPLICATION AND IF HE SLASH SHE [yes she pronounced the slash] IS INTERESTED, THEY'LL CALL YOU BACK ! *CLICK!!!*Needless to say I was pissed off....Especially by the fact that it seemed as though everyone but me was getting jobs left and right. So I was mad for the rest of the day. I decided that I wasn't allowing myself to talk to ANYBODY until I got a JOB. So anyway, on my way home [on the train]...I was thinking. I couldn't stop thinking about why WHY I had been put in this position. WHY was it ME that couldn't find a job. Well anyway....I was sitting there...and the lady a couple rows down, I saw, was reading a book. The title of the book was "WHO AM I & WHY AM I HERE ?" And that boook musta got me thinking for real !! I couldn't help but ask myself those same questions. Sooo annyway...fast foward.I get home & I decide to do something that I haven't done in a while. The issue with the job at the church, is that......basically I NEED TO BE IN CHURCH NOT AT CHURCH. I had to WORK DURING church and I didn't like that. I wanted to have another job by Saturday so I could quit on Sunday. So anyway...I was reading the Bible. And I swear to you...........IT ALL BECAME SO CLEAR. Proverbs 3.1-6....Lean NOT unto my own understanding. Matthew 6.33---Seek FIRST the kingdom....&& all things ELSE will be added unto thee....[REVALATION]....I DON'T NEED A JOB THAT'S GOING TO INTERFERE WITH CHURCH. I'M NOT GOING TO SAY IT LIKE I'M A SAINT, BUT I THINK THAT GOD GAVE ME THE JOB AND CAN GIVE ME ANOTHER ONE. [not even supposed to be WORKING on the Sabbath.]But...even though I had figured that part out....I still wondered....WHAT IS MY PURPOSE [not who am i ?] && WHY AM I HERE ?



So yesterday, which was Tuesday, I didn't go to class. I was sitting on the computer and I was SOOOOO freakin bored man. So I was on MySpace. I hadn't been on there for a while man....Don't you know how you go to look at ONE persons page on MySpace and end up on a lot of different peoples page ? Well, I ended up on this dudes page. I noticed that a lot of his friends were my friends. Even though I don't PERSONALLY know him, I recognized him as this dude Rob Cotton that people I know, know. So when I got to his page....this song came on. It was kinda hot. So I let it play...The first song was called LOVE. So when it got to the second song, I'm still hearing it. BUT NOW, IM LISTENING TO IT. Theres a difference between HEARING and LISTENING. But anyhow, this next song freakin blew my mind man.....I actually REPLAYED IT. Like real talk...so the lyrics was raw. The beat was raw. The verses was raw. EVERYTHING WAS HOT. I went to this next song that I had heard before by N-Crowd....so anyway. MAKING A LONG STORY SHORT. It was 6 songs on his page. By the time I got to the last one.....I had one thought in my mind: THIS DUDE IS A GENIUS....a] I don't say that about many people. b] His stuff got a message/story behind it. c] his beats are freakin OFF the chain. d] he does it ALL in the name of Our Savior [even if it's not about him]......so I was on Facebook at the same time. I was like I don't know this dude....so I shouldn't say nothing to him...I got off the computer...When I got back on, I was still addicted to that MySpace playlist !! I let it play like 3 or 4 more times. I decided to message him. I thought, dude needs to know how good he is. Since I don't know him, I don't know if anyone ever told him. I wasn't looking for nothing or wasn't tryna meet nobody new [oh well I DID want a CD..lol]. So anyway, I message him like dude yo stuff is real hot....its real and it's off the chain. He replied. I was talking to him......And he seemed to REALLY appreciate that.POINT OF THE STORY: I was able to help somebody yesterday and encourage them to keep on doin them. && for that....I'm proud of me. YALL NEED TO GO TO MYSPACE.....www.myspace.com/spudcotton AND LISTEN TO THIS MAN. HE'S A BEAST. REEEAL TALK.

Who Do I Trust ?

Who do I trust ?I think that I've spent my whole life depending on PEOPLE. Not as in certain people, but people period. I usually don't solve problems on my own, when I'm bored I call/text people, I'm always asking someone a favor or something & I think that I'm starting to be surrounded with people who don't give a damn about me anymore. Hell people who never gave a damn about me in the FIRST place. I don't have too many resourceful people that I know and I find that a problem. What does that mean ? It means, that I don't know that many people who surround they self with people who can help me go someplace in life. [I think I said this before but I'll say it again.] THE BROOKS 2008 GRADUATION SPEAKER SAID THAT YOUR SUCCESS IN THE NEXT TEN YEARS IS DETERMINED BY YOUR FIVE CLOSEST FRIENDS && THE BOOKS THAT YOU READ !!! I care too much about other people & that has to stop. They always say live & learn & that's the truth. I CAN NOT, NOR WILL I, CONTINUE TO MAKE OTHER PEOPLE AS OR MORE IMPORTANT THAN MYLES XAVIER LOVE.

IM SO BORED !

NOW ]Current mood: SleepyCurrent music: None at the momentCurrent taste: What do I taste like or what taste is in my mouth ? Im not clearCurrent hair: Nappy as hell.Current clothes: Track t-shirt. drawers. house shoes.Current annoyance: that its cold in this damn house and its summertime.Current smell: .....nothing.....Current thing I should be doing: sleep...washing dishes...making booty calls..etcCurrent windows open: FACEBOOK, checkers, aol, shakita instant message, chris instant message. Current desktop picture: Mizzou !Current favorite band: idk.....Fountains of Wayne ?Current book:None.Current cd in stereo: Well I just re-loaded the carter 3 on my ipod if that countsCurrent crush: yep.Current favorite celeb: idk....umm...me shoot.[ DO YOU.. ]Smoke?: NODo drugs?: NO Have a dream that keeps coming back?: Never actually.Remember your first love? ....Love is such as strong word. but yeahStill love him/her?: Hell no...Read the newspaper?: Yep...news people are too dramatic for me.Have any gay or lesbian friends?: Not....that...oh wait yeah theres 1.Believe in miracles?: YUPBelieve it's possible to remain faithful forever?: If you married i hope soConsider yourself tolerant of others? Hell no.Consider love a mistake?: Nah....Like the taste of alcohol? Depeneds...Have a favorite candy? Atrawberry Laffy Taffy....Believe in astrology?: Sometimes...Believe in magic?: No ?Believe in God?: Of course.Have any pets: Not at the moment.Go to or plan to go to college: OH YES ! MIZZOU ALLDAY !Have any piercings?: Not yet.Have any tattoos?: Not yet.Hate yourself: ....Me ? Hate ME ? How could I ?Have an obsession?: Yes.....Have a secret crush?: You asked me that already get it together....Have a best friend?: Yep....3.Wish on stars?: ...Do I look like some lil white girl stuck on her daddys ranch down south ?[ LOVE LIFE ]Ever been in love?: IN love...no.When did you lose your virginity?: WOW.Do you believe in love at first sight?: Hell no.Do you believe in "the one?": YESDescribe your ideal significant other: OMG...It is sooo sexy when women drive motorcylces. but sexy, smart. good job. idk....[ETC]Have you ever played a game that required removal of clothing?: actually no...ill have to look into thatHave you ever been intoxicated?: HELL NO.Have you ever been caught "doing something?": What is doing something ? Tying my shoe ? yep. On the computer ? Yep.Are you a tease?: Idk....Shy to make the first move?: I think so...[ APPEARANCE ]Hair: Red....[for real thol]Eyes: BrownHeight: 5'11[ LAST THING.. ]Bought: PopeyesAte & Drank: Ummm.....chips and iced teaRead: i dont remember !!!damn !Watched on TV: iCarly, Family Matters && Family Guy....[ EITHER OR.. ]beer or cider: neitherdrinks or shots: drink...cats or dogs:DOGS !!! I HATE CATSTHEY SNEAKY AND CUNIVING !single or taken: single....[unless she wanna change that...]pen or pencil: PENgloves or mittens:GLOVESfood or candy:FOODcassette or cd: 2008. iPod...coke or pepsi: Pepsi.[ WHO DO YOU WANT TO.. ]kill: I wouldn't say kill.....just maybe bodily harm...but ummm yeah.get really wasted with: Tracee !!!!! lmao.look like: MYLES !!!!avoid: negative people.[ LAST PERSON YOU.. ]saw: My mamatalked to on the phone: Tahitehugged: Dont remember.instant messaged: Alice...Shakita....Chriskissed:.......as in what KIND of kiss ?[ HAVE YOU EVER.. ]Drank alcohol?: YESDone drugs?: CRACK IS CHEAP I HAVE MADE TO MUCH MONEY TO EVER SMOKE CRACK CRACK IS WACK !Broken the law?: Really tho...who hasnt ?Run away from home?: lol....kindaBroken a bone?? Thank God no.Played Truth Or Dare?: You gotta be a lame to put no here.Kissed someone you didn't know?: Yeah....lol.Been in a fight?: Please. I wish I would fight somebody....Come close to dying?: ....... no[ WHAT IS.. ]Your bedroom like?:messyYour favorite thing for breakfast?: Pancakes !Your favorite restaurant?: TGI FRIDAYS !!!What's on your bedside table?:lol....wouldnt u like to know ?What do you eat when you raid the fridge late at night? Duh...raid means to take whatevers there....What is your biggest fear?: Losing me to myself.Describe your bed: Full....room 4 two .[wink...lmao]Spontaneous or plain?: CRAZY.Do you know how to play poker?: Hell no.What do you carry with you at all times?: MY PHONE AND MY IPOD.How do you drive?: I drive safely but hell if i got someplace to be then lets move it.What do you miss most about being little?: not having nothing to do around the house.Are you happy with your given name?: Naw cuz [no homo] but the negro I was named after was bout ugly as hell...looked like an ape.What color is your bedroom?: white ?Have you ever been in a play?: yepDo you consider yourself to be a nice person?: Hell no

NOW ]Current mood: SleepyCurrent music: None at the momentCurrent taste: What do I taste like or what taste is in my mouth ? Im not clearCurrent hair: Nappy as hell.Current clothes: Track t-shirt. drawers. house shoes.Current annoyance: that its cold in this damn house and its summertime.Current smell: .....nothing.....Current thing I should be doing: sleep...washing dishes...making booty calls..etcCurrent windows open: FACEBOOK, checkers, aol, shakita instant message, chris instant message. Current desktop picture: Mizzou !Current favorite band: idk.....Fountains of Wayne ?Current book:None.Current cd in stereo: Well I just re-loaded the carter 3 on my ipod if that countsCurrent crush: yep.Current favorite celeb: idk....umm...me shoot.[ DO YOU.. ]Smoke?: NODo drugs?: NO Have a dream that keeps coming back?: Never actually.Remember your first love? ....Love is such as strong word. but yeahStill love him/her?: Hell no...Read the newspaper?: Yep...news people are too dramatic for me.Have any gay or lesbian friends?: Not....that...oh wait yeah theres 1.Believe in miracles?: YUPBelieve it's possible to remain faithful forever?: If you married i hope soConsider yourself tolerant of others? Hell no.Consider love a mistake?: Nah....Like the taste of alcohol? Depeneds...Have a favorite candy? Atrawberry Laffy Taffy....Believe in astrology?: Sometimes...Believe in magic?: No ?Believe in God?: Of course.Have any pets: Not at the moment.Go to or plan to go to college: OH YES ! MIZZOU ALLDAY !Have any piercings?: Not yet.Have any tattoos?: Not yet.Hate yourself: ....Me ? Hate ME ? How could I ?Have an obsession?: Yes.....Have a secret crush?: You asked me that already get it together....Have a best friend?: Yep....3.Wish on stars?: ...Do I look like some lil white girl stuck on her daddys ranch down south ?[ LOVE LIFE ]Ever been in love?: IN love...no.When did you lose your virginity?: WOW.Do you believe in love at first sight?: Hell no.Do you believe in "the one?": YESDescribe your ideal significant other: OMG...It is sooo sexy when women drive motorcylces. but sexy, smart. good job. idk....[ETC]Have you ever played a game that required removal of clothing?: actually no...ill have to look into thatHave you ever been intoxicated?: HELL NO.Have you ever been caught "doing something?": What is doing something ? Tying my shoe ? yep. On the computer ? Yep.Are you a tease?: Idk....Shy to make the first move?: I think so...[ APPEARANCE ]Hair: Red....[for real thol]Eyes: BrownHeight: 5'11[ LAST THING.. ]Bought: PopeyesAte & Drank: Ummm.....chips and iced teaRead: i dont remember !!!damn !Watched on TV: iCarly, Family Matters && Family Guy....[ EITHER OR.. ]beer or cider: neitherdrinks or shots: drink...cats or dogs:DOGS !!! I HATE CATSTHEY SNEAKY AND CUNIVING !single or taken: single....[unless she wanna change that...]pen or pencil: PENgloves or mittens:GLOVESfood or candy:FOODcassette or cd: 2008. iPod...coke or pepsi: Pepsi.[ WHO DO YOU WANT TO.. ]kill: I wouldn't say kill.....just maybe bodily harm...but ummm yeah.get really wasted with: Tracee !!!!! lmao.look like: MYLES !!!!avoid: negative people.[ LAST PERSON YOU.. ]saw: My mamatalked to on the phone: Tahitehugged: Dont remember.instant messaged: Alice...Shakita....Chriskissed:.......as in what KIND of kiss ?[ HAVE YOU EVER.. ]Drank alcohol?: YESDone drugs?: CRACK IS CHEAP I HAVE MADE TO MUCH MONEY TO EVER SMOKE CRACK CRACK IS WACK !Broken the law?: Really tho...who hasnt ?Run away from home?: lol....kindaBroken a bone?? Thank God no.Played Truth Or Dare?: You gotta be a lame to put no here.Kissed someone you didn't know?: Yeah....lol.Been in a fight?: Please. I wish I would fight somebody....Come close to dying?: ....... no[ WHAT IS.. ]Your bedroom like?:messyYour favorite thing for breakfast?: Pancakes !Your favorite restaurant?: TGI FRIDAYS !!!What's on your bedside table?:lol....wouldnt u like to know ?What do you eat when you raid the fridge late at night? Duh...raid means to take whatevers there....What is your biggest fear?: Losing me to myself.Describe your bed: Full....room 4 two .[wink...lmao]Spontaneous or plain?: CRAZY.Do you know how to play poker?: Hell no.What do you carry with you at all times?: MY PHONE AND MY IPOD.How do you drive?: I drive safely but hell if i got someplace to be then lets move it.What do you miss most about being little?: not having nothing to do around the house.Are you happy with your given name?: Naw cuz [no homo] but the negro I was named after was bout ugly as hell...looked like an ape.What color is your bedroom?: white ?Have you ever been in a play?: yepDo you consider yourself to be a nice person?: Hell no

What Happened to Me ?

Man, lemme tell yall since school got out, I have changed SO much.I don't know why, but I've become this big non-chalant PERSON who don't really care about anything. There have been so many things that have happened that I'm shocked that I didn't go off at. It's like even with this new attitude, I've aquired new ways of doing stuff. I used to wonder why someone would stop texting....&& now it's like ohhh they not texting me, oh well. I have NEVER been that way before. I used to spend all my time on facebook....Now, it's like wtf is on facebook ? People. Mostly people who I don't even care about. Sooooo, how about i get off the damn computer && go find something to do. I dont care who don't like who. Man, I thought I would get mad cuz no one said they could talk to me about anything in they lil notes....I DIDN'T. I've gained a totally new concept on life. And I swear that I didn't even try to become like this. It just happened. iThis is all just coming outta nowhere I swear it is. Let's review.== People dont text back. [Old Myles] Man, they must be mad at me. [Myles].......Oh well.== Myles people stay talking about you. [Old Myles] Who ? What ? When? What they say ? [Myles] That's beautiful. == I mean, I would tell you, but it's personal. [Old Myles] What you mean PERSONAL ? Y U CANT TELL ME ?! [Myles] Ok. Well if you wanna talk about it let me know.The business of others don't interest me, and I'm not interested in anybody or anyTHING that's NOT going to help me get anywhere in the next 4 years. The speaker at the Brooks graduation this year said that where you go in life is determined by the books you read.....AND YOUR FIVE CLOSEST FRIENDS !!! I don't know if yall can get the drift or not, but I'm NOT the same person who you thought you knew. Hell I'm not the same person I thought I knew.I dont owe anybody an explanation, but I wrote this note to basically say: Dont be offended. Dont be mad. If you don't like me Oh Well..Get off facebook.How about we act like sophomores next year ??......[This note was SHORT. lol]

Why the Lakers Lost ?

The Celtics are the NBA Champs 2008.The Laker's COULD have been [even though they can't match them Celtics boy !!!!]These are the reasons WHY the Lakers didn't win.- This game...the final one, they played like some straight lil punk ass bitches.- Kobe is not the only fucking player ON the damn team.- The Lakers have no heart [period]- What the hell is up with they defense ??? STICK SOMEBODY !!!!!!!!!- They played the finals like they expected to lose.Thing about it, BASKETBALL IS NOT FOOTBALL, ANYBODY can win a basketball game in the last few seconds if they determined to win.....THATS WHY THE LAKERS LOST !!!!!!!!And I don't know WHO number 7 is for the Lakers, but that nigga the only one on the team playing like he got some type of heart IN him !!! big ups to him...CELTICS 2008 CHAMPS ALL DAY !!!!!!! THESE EYES GLOW GREEN ALWAYS !!!![oh wait.....3 questions lol...]When Tim Duncan && K.G start playing for the Celtics ?!?!When did Lamar Odom start playing for the Lakers ???When they change Kobe number to 24 ?!SERIOUSLY !!! I DONT KEEP UP WIT BASKETBALL LIKE THAT !!!!!