I'm BACK baby!

Maaan. I haven't written on this blog in a real long time. I don't even know why I do it. Maybe I'll start doing it on regular. Life is O.C. For real.............Get back at yall with that, though.

Yeah...Nothing Special [Went to church today.]

Wow.

I am so content being me. Before, I had some issues wanting other people's lives. I have realized though, that it's perfectly OTAY to be myself because everybody has problems. So if it's not one thing it's another. I have also realized that even though they really get on my nerves, I have really great friends & associates. Some of them can have they little attitudes sometimes, but I love them ALL none-the-less. But I'm a person of my own and can't stand on them, that's the thing. I have a wonderful life, wonderful people, and everything's going GREAT.

In only two short days, I'll have my schedule for sophomore year. I can't believe I'm not a freshman anymore. Before I know it; I'll be gone ! But that's wayyy ahead in the future. ANYHOW, today's sermon was excellent and talked about how we shouldn't let other people deter us from what we are supposed to do or what our dreams are. I really do believe that because the world is FULL of haters who want nothing more than to see you fail.

TO PUT IT IN A NUTSHELL; MY LIFE IS FANTASTIC ! I KNOW SUCH WOOOONDERFUL PEOPLE, GOOOT MONEY, AND LIVE THE LIFE OF A TRUE MOGUL !
OH YEAH !

Membership Sunday !

Today was Membership Sunday at Salem Baptist Church of Chicago !!! I went wit my lil all white on lookin REEEAL good along with my two friends Kam'ryne and Arriel. It was a really great service and Ienjoyed it. Our church under the wonderful leadership of our PASTOR is doing great things and I can't wait to be apart of them. The school system is shot to hell and something needs to be DONE about it ! But, in OTHER news, today concluded MyChicago which now means I can devote the rest of my summer to working, and getting ready for school. I register for sophomore year on AUGUST 19 2008 !!! OH YEAH 2011 IN THE BUILDING ! But for now, life is going pretty decent........I think there's something EXCELLENT in store for me. It just hasn't been yet revealed.
=]

What's Really Good in the Hood ?

As I stated in the first post, I see and hear a lot on the train.
This is something that happened to me on the way HOME....[not really HAPPENED, but something I noticed.]
There was this young dude on the train who musta been like, 18 or 19, and he was just sitting there. He honestly had the appearance of a hard ass gangster. Like real talk. So I'm thinking, oh shit, what he finna be on, you know, you USUALLY think when you see someone you think is up to no good. So, buddy's phone rings. It's his mama. He like hey mama, yeah mama I'm on my way home....and he was quiet , idk his mama must have been asking him something....then he was like, man I been on the train all day. I just went out and didn't come back [yeah he's still on the phone]. He was like, it's too much going on at home and I can't stay there. On the block it's too much to deal with. He was like, Man my friend got killed Monday and just yesterday this nigga got shot in the alley. Then he was talking about how that wasn't the life he wanted and how he just didn't want to be killed before he could figure out how to turn it around. He was like it's too much. I just had to go. He rode ALLLL the way to Howard and BACK.........Man.

Just take that in. What the hell are we doing black people ? SERIOUSLY. This AIN'T cool.

* ONE MORE [positive] note* One bus I got on today, it was this real young dude musta been about 21 or 22 driving the bus. He was a trainee because there was this CTA man with a white shit standing over his shoulder telling him, ok you finna stop here and all that kinda stuff. Even though dude had on TWO ear rings && his hat was cocked, I respected him because he was driving a damn bus. A bus that his friends could get on and see him, or ANYTHING. He don't feel like he need to be on the streets to get his money. He was polite and whatnot, he ain't have no attitude or nothing. He greeted the people [GENUINELY] as the got on and exited the bus.
I'm glad to see if nothing but ONE POSITIVE BLACK MAN [whom I don't know I guess] doing something that seperates himself from what everyone else wants us to be.........

I believe that children are our future.......

Even though I this is my first blog post, I'm not about to start with the usual--this is my first blog post blah, blah, blah. I'm going to talk about my break through that I had today.

I'm able to get a lot of thinking done in the mornings on the train, on my way downtown. Some people read, some people talk loud and ignorant as hell on the phone, some people text, most people listen to music, but I just sit, and look, and listen. I find a lot of things SO interesting, and there isn't a day that goes by that I see something that speaks to me.

This morning, on the train, I saw this lady and her daughter. So the lady was a nice, young black lady. She wasn't loud, cussing at the little girl or anything like that and I really don't know where they were going. So anyway I'm NOTICING them because I'm sitting down and they were standing like right next to that lil plexi-glass when you finna get off. The little girl was so adorable. She musta been about 5 or 6 years old. So she started singing "We Will Rock You" I started smiling to myself because I was amazed that this little girl knew the words to this song. Anyway she's talking to her mother asking her about the train and stuff, and the mother is politely responding back and I'm listening. This little girl aint dumb, she don't appear to be a genius or anything like that but she just has SO MUCH SPIRIT ! She like mama where do we get off ? What' sthat ? Does that do this ? That's when it hit me; THAT LITTLE GIRL CAN GROW UP TO BE ANYTHING SHE WANTS. ANYTHING. A-N-Y-T-H-I-N-G. But she doesn't even have a chance with our school systems shot to hell. Today, I realized that while little kids get on my nerve....that they are really worth it. Somebody needs to start making a positive impact on the lives of children today [becuz hell, CPS who SUPPOSED to be doing it, damn sho AINT]......I think today for the first time, I felt like a child was somebody who is going to run this world someday, and needs to be taught how to do so........&& what a better to help DO so, then me ?

Who Am I && Why Am I Here ?

So Monday.....I was downtown in the class at Loyola. The day was going fairly decent I would say. All the way up until lunchtime, when my day came spiraling down. I was being annoyed at the class because I wanted to go home. There was ANOTHER person who was aggravating me OUTSIDE of the class [as in someone I was texting]. Yeah so anyway,....most of you know that I've been looking for a job. A REAL JOB. Most of you ALSO know that I currently...well I used to have a job ummm...working at my church [yeah...we'll say that.] So I decided to call one of the places that I applied to, during my lunchtime. I called AMC THEATERS FORD CITY. So when I called the lady is like THANKYOUFORCALLINGFORDCITYAMCTHEATERSHOWMAYIHELPYOU. So I'm like Hello, May I speak to the manager please ? ONEMOMENT. The manager Delores, gets on the phone and is like THISISDELORESMANAGEROFAMCFORDCITYWHATCANIHELPYOUWITH ? So I explained to her that I filled out the application && that I was calling to find out the status of it. She gave me THE most generic answer "THE MANAGER[refering to herself in third person] IS CURRENTLY REVIEWING ALL SUBMITED APPLICATION AND IF HE SLASH SHE [yes she pronounced the slash] IS INTERESTED, THEY'LL CALL YOU BACK ! *CLICK!!!*Needless to say I was pissed off....Especially by the fact that it seemed as though everyone but me was getting jobs left and right. So I was mad for the rest of the day. I decided that I wasn't allowing myself to talk to ANYBODY until I got a JOB. So anyway, on my way home [on the train]...I was thinking. I couldn't stop thinking about why WHY I had been put in this position. WHY was it ME that couldn't find a job. Well anyway....I was sitting there...and the lady a couple rows down, I saw, was reading a book. The title of the book was "WHO AM I & WHY AM I HERE ?" And that boook musta got me thinking for real !! I couldn't help but ask myself those same questions. Sooo annyway...fast foward.I get home & I decide to do something that I haven't done in a while. The issue with the job at the church, is that......basically I NEED TO BE IN CHURCH NOT AT CHURCH. I had to WORK DURING church and I didn't like that. I wanted to have another job by Saturday so I could quit on Sunday. So anyway...I was reading the Bible. And I swear to you...........IT ALL BECAME SO CLEAR. Proverbs 3.1-6....Lean NOT unto my own understanding. Matthew 6.33---Seek FIRST the kingdom....&& all things ELSE will be added unto thee....[REVALATION]....I DON'T NEED A JOB THAT'S GOING TO INTERFERE WITH CHURCH. I'M NOT GOING TO SAY IT LIKE I'M A SAINT, BUT I THINK THAT GOD GAVE ME THE JOB AND CAN GIVE ME ANOTHER ONE. [not even supposed to be WORKING on the Sabbath.]But...even though I had figured that part out....I still wondered....WHAT IS MY PURPOSE [not who am i ?] && WHY AM I HERE ?



So yesterday, which was Tuesday, I didn't go to class. I was sitting on the computer and I was SOOOOO freakin bored man. So I was on MySpace. I hadn't been on there for a while man....Don't you know how you go to look at ONE persons page on MySpace and end up on a lot of different peoples page ? Well, I ended up on this dudes page. I noticed that a lot of his friends were my friends. Even though I don't PERSONALLY know him, I recognized him as this dude Rob Cotton that people I know, know. So when I got to his page....this song came on. It was kinda hot. So I let it play...The first song was called LOVE. So when it got to the second song, I'm still hearing it. BUT NOW, IM LISTENING TO IT. Theres a difference between HEARING and LISTENING. But anyhow, this next song freakin blew my mind man.....I actually REPLAYED IT. Like real talk...so the lyrics was raw. The beat was raw. The verses was raw. EVERYTHING WAS HOT. I went to this next song that I had heard before by N-Crowd....so anyway. MAKING A LONG STORY SHORT. It was 6 songs on his page. By the time I got to the last one.....I had one thought in my mind: THIS DUDE IS A GENIUS....a] I don't say that about many people. b] His stuff got a message/story behind it. c] his beats are freakin OFF the chain. d] he does it ALL in the name of Our Savior [even if it's not about him]......so I was on Facebook at the same time. I was like I don't know this dude....so I shouldn't say nothing to him...I got off the computer...When I got back on, I was still addicted to that MySpace playlist !! I let it play like 3 or 4 more times. I decided to message him. I thought, dude needs to know how good he is. Since I don't know him, I don't know if anyone ever told him. I wasn't looking for nothing or wasn't tryna meet nobody new [oh well I DID want a CD..lol]. So anyway, I message him like dude yo stuff is real hot....its real and it's off the chain. He replied. I was talking to him......And he seemed to REALLY appreciate that.POINT OF THE STORY: I was able to help somebody yesterday and encourage them to keep on doin them. && for that....I'm proud of me. YALL NEED TO GO TO MYSPACE.....www.myspace.com/spudcotton AND LISTEN TO THIS MAN. HE'S A BEAST. REEEAL TALK.

Who Do I Trust ?

Who do I trust ?I think that I've spent my whole life depending on PEOPLE. Not as in certain people, but people period. I usually don't solve problems on my own, when I'm bored I call/text people, I'm always asking someone a favor or something & I think that I'm starting to be surrounded with people who don't give a damn about me anymore. Hell people who never gave a damn about me in the FIRST place. I don't have too many resourceful people that I know and I find that a problem. What does that mean ? It means, that I don't know that many people who surround they self with people who can help me go someplace in life. [I think I said this before but I'll say it again.] THE BROOKS 2008 GRADUATION SPEAKER SAID THAT YOUR SUCCESS IN THE NEXT TEN YEARS IS DETERMINED BY YOUR FIVE CLOSEST FRIENDS && THE BOOKS THAT YOU READ !!! I care too much about other people & that has to stop. They always say live & learn & that's the truth. I CAN NOT, NOR WILL I, CONTINUE TO MAKE OTHER PEOPLE AS OR MORE IMPORTANT THAN MYLES XAVIER LOVE.